


Cursed? Part 1: Gypsies, Tramps, and Thieves

by Noonesangel_noonesbitch



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Anal Play, Angst, Drinking, Homophobic Slurs, Magic, Masturbation, Multi, Oral sex mentioned, Original Character(s), Rimming, self discovery, will not give away entire plot in tags
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-13
Updated: 2017-01-13
Packaged: 2018-09-17 04:37:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,911
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9304556
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Noonesangel_noonesbitch/pseuds/Noonesangel_noonesbitch
Summary: Merle is at a bar drinking and being Merle. He offends his waitress by grabbing her ass. What he doesn't know is she a gypsy, he stiffs her on the tip and a journey begins.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to my family/friends who read bits and pieces of this, cheered me on, and encouraged me not to give up. 
> 
> A very special thank you to my Jellybean! Thank you for being a sounding board, an ass kicker and a fabulous beta! *mwah* I owe you big time! 
> 
> As always I do not own any of The Walking Dead characters, I just borrow them for my own twisted delight. Please enjoy!

  
"Yer buying this round Joe." Merle sneered as he snapped his fingers impatiently at their waitress.

"Why? Cause yer sorry ass won in pool?"

"Nah. Cause ya owe me, that's why! Stuck me wit that damn butt ugly cousin of yers all weekend an' I never even got laid!"

Joe burst into loud obnoxious laughter. "She didn't put out?"

"Hell naw! Bitch was a three bagger an' a fuckin' prude. Couldn' even get her give me any head! Fuck that, you owe me two 'er three rounds!"

The waitress offered the men a small guarded smile. She was petite, olive skinned, with a long mane of Raven black hair and stunning green eyes. Merle whistled low. She ignored him as she asked Joe what they needed.

"Damn girl. I can think of a few thangs I need right now." He ogled her as Joe ordered their beers. She quickly left their table.

"That is one fine piece of ass."

Joe shook his head. "I know I'm a pig but damn Merle, you're worse than me."

Merle oinked then laughed. "Call em like I see em an' I like what I see on her."

 

Four rounds later they were still drinking. Merle was louder and more offensive than usual. "So I wake up on tha couch an' stumble into tha damn kitchen. My head feels like it's bout ta explode an there they are making out right next ta tha damn Cornflakes. It's one thang ta know my baby brother likes dick, it's a fucking horse of a goddamn different color ta see him sucking tha face offa Officer Friendly first thing in tha mornin!"

"That when you kicked him out?"

"Yer goddamn right I did. I told him ta get his shit an' kick rocks. Woulda been better if I'd been in my house when I said it." Merle muttered that last part into his beer.

Joe guffawed. "Where the hell were you?"

"Friendly's. But damnit, they knew what I meant! None that shit in my house! Jus' don't know why he can't be normal." Merle added miserably.

"Maybe that's normal. Maybe he thinks you're weird for chasing pussy all the time."

Merle glared at Joe. He would not even entertain the thought that Joe might have a point. He reached out and grabbed the waitress's ass.

"That is not on the menu!" She snapped at Merle.

"Got a mouth on ya, don'tcha? Know what ya could do with that mouth."

"I'd rather eat rancid rhino ass than get anywhere near your pencil dick."

Merle sneered and growled at the young woman. She didn't back down or cower.

"Let's get tha fuck outta here Joe. They don't treat tha customers too good these days." Merle stood and turned to go.

"Aren't you forgetting something?"

Merle faced her and grinned cruelly. "Nah sugartits. I only tip if ya earn it. Ya damn sure didn't. Here's a tip fer ya, learn ta be fuckin' nice ta yer customers."

"Your heart's deepest desires will show themselves and your truest nature will be revealed to all."

"Well thanks but ya still ain't gettin' a tip sweetcheeks."

She smiled broadly as he left the bar. "Oh I don't need one...." The soft tinkle of her laugh sounded like chimes.

\-----------------------------------------------

Merle woke up late. His bleary eyes could barely read the time on his alarm clock. "Fuck!" He was already an hour late.

He picked up his cell to call Daryl. "Yeah yeah, I fuckin' know what time it is. Shit. Fine, I'll close. Wait, hold the fuckin' phone, what?! No fuckin' way, Darlina! I fuckin' hate workin' on that car with that asshole! Damnit!" Daryl cut him off with a snarl and hung up.

Merle flung the phone down on the bed. Not only did he have to close but he had to deal with Deputy Shane mother fucking Walsh. He groaned. That smug son of a bitch always rode Merle's ass. _"Ya wish he would."_ Merle's neck snapped. What? What did he just think? "Musta got drunker than I thought."

He sat up to clear his head. A few rounds of beer shouldn't have made him feel like his mouth was filled with sand or that his brain had been wrapped in gauze. Yet that's what it felt like. Shane was a perfectionist about that patrol cruiser, downright anal. _"Anal? Heh, that's a good one."_

Merle shook his head hard. He tried to clear his mind. He needed to get his ass in gear and get to work. He wanted coffee and a damn cigarette. Slowly he moved, stretched, then yawned. His nose wrinkled. Fuck he stank! He needed a shower. He glared at the clock. Fuck it, he was already late.

The hot water felt great on his skin. The scent of coffee wafted through the house. Merle inhaled deeply. He closed his eyes. He scrubbed himself roughly with his hands. He let his mind wander as he washed up.

An image of Shane popped into his head. Uniform pants cupping his ass, that deputy badge on his chest, those biceps bulging underneath his shirt, gun belt slung low on those slender hips, cuffs in hand, and that cocky ass grin on his face. Merle found he was rock hard and idly stroking himself. "What tha everloving fuck?!"

He flipped the hot water completely off with shaky hands. Cold water spewed out over him. He shivered more from the image his mind had conjured up than the icy water. Merle stood under the cold spray until his body and mind were both numb. What the hell was wrong with him?

  
Merle was two and a half hours late once he finally arrived at work.

"Tha hell ya been?! Got cars piling up. Yer closin' an workin' late tonight." Daryl barked without any real heat, but Merle knew that Daryl was serious.

This shop was Daryl's dream, his baby. He held Merle to strict standards of work conduct after hiring him on when Merle got out of prison a few years earlier. He randomly drug tested Merle. Merle bitched about it even if secretly he was thankful to his baby brother for helping keep him clean. Merle's parole was up and he was a free man. Both Dixon brothers wanted to keep it that way.

"Yeah, yeah Boss."

Daryl eyed his brother. "Ya usin'?"

"Fuck no! I went out with Joe last night."

"How fucked up did ya get?"

"Only had a few rounds o' beers Ma."

"Ya look like ya been on a three day drunk. What happened?"

Merle's head hurt like there was a tiny man playing the drums on his brain. "Beers. Nuthin' else." He silently added, "that I remember."

He fished his phone from the back pocket of his coveralls. He typed up a quick text to Joe. "What the fuck happened last night?"

"We had about twelve beers each."

"That all?"

"Yeah. Took your drunk ass home after you got into it with that gypsy waitress. You were more drunk on just beer than I've ever seen ya."

"Gypsy?"

"Yeah. Miri is a full blooded gypsy. Tried to tell you that. That curse she put on you take yet?"

"Fuck no. I don't believe shit like that. I gotta get back to work."

Merle shoved the phone back in his pocket. Their grandmother had warned them of gypsy magic, white magic, black magic, voodoo, healing magic, dark magic. He hadn't put any stock in it but Daryl had hung on every word. He snorted in disgust.

"Little bitch musta put somethin' in my beer." He headed for his bay to start working.

  
Around noon Rick and Shane showed up to take Daryl to lunch. The other guys in the shop; Dale, the retired mechanic turned manager, Tobin, their transmission specialist, Tyrese, their body shop specialist, and the part time mechanic, Noah all ordered pizza. Merle declined the offer to join them. Everyone had given him a wide berth all morning. His usual smart ass comments were missing. His mind kept wandering to places it did not belong. The whole experience left him more than a little rattled, grouchy, and unusually quiet.

Merle tried to focus on the engine he was rebuilding. He nearly jumped out of his skin when Shane's voice came from right behind him. He had been so lost in thought he didn't hear the man approach.

Merle banged his head on the hood of the car as he stood up. "Jesus H. Christ, Walsh!" He rubbed the back of his head. "Mother fucker, whatcha doin' sneaking up on a guy under a hood?!"

Shane chuckled. "Jumpy much Dixon? Daryl wanted to know if you wanted something from the diner."

"Nah. Ain't hungry." Merle couldn't look Shane in his face. The thoughts that Merle had been having about the deputy all morning had the older Dixon's face burning with a deep flush.

"Daryl tell ya I'm coming by at closing tonight?"

Merle must have imagined that Shane's voice became softer, more intimate. "Yeah. Don't keep me waitin' all damn night either. I got shit ta do."

"Yeah, yeah. Don't get your panties in a twist Merle. I'll be a perfect gentleman. I'll show up on time or at least call if I'm gonna be late." Shane winked and laughed as Merle's mouth gaped open.

Merle sputtered, "Fuck you Asshole."

"Only if you beg real nice, sweetheart. And it's Officer. You need to learn my title and start using it." Shane all but growled. His stare was dark and intense.

Merle swallowed the moan that rose up in his throat. "Yes sir" echoed excitedly in his head. He felt himself get immediately and completely hard at Shane's words. He slouched forward to hide his erection as well as his embarrassment. His foot caught on the rolling toolbox and sent it careening into the side of the vehicle.

"Shit!" Merle hissed the word like a snake coiling back on itself. He heard the all too familiar scratch of metal. "Fuck" he mumbled.

"What happened Merle?!" Daryl was beside Shane in a flash. He eyed the now scratched vehicle.

"Tripped s'all."

"Y'all go on ta lunch without me. 'M stay here. Hafta get Tyrese ta buff that out."

Daryl eyed his older brother. Something wasn't right. Merle hadn't made eye contact with anyone, in fact he was squatted down picking up tools. No cussing, no blaming, no sass mouth comments. Something was definitely off.

Rick pouted. "I'm going to bring y'all burgers with fries and apple pies on our way back through."

"Strawberry milkshake too please." Daryl winked and leaned forward to kiss his husband. "I'll take ya ta that nice place on tha lake tonight. Just us."

Rick grinned as he kissed Daryl. "Deal!"

Shane watched Merle move in silence. The normally defiant, dominate Dixon looked completely submissive at the moment. Merle was on his knees with a tool in each hand. His shoulders were slumped. His head was down with his face turned away from them. He looked so small, almost lost, yet beautiful and wild.

Shane shook his head. He couldn't afford thoughts like that. Not everyone knew Shane was bi. Looking at Merle the way he was at the moment was a sure way to get the other Dixon to kick the deputy's ass. Something in Merle had always called to Shane. He couldn't tell you what it was if his life depended on it. Shane wasn't given to deep thought most of the time. He liked what he liked. Something in him liked Merle more than was safe or comfortable for either of them.

"Want a milkshake to go with yours, Merle?" Shane asked softly.

Merle didn't bother to look up. He just shook his head. "No, thank you, Officer."

Shane blinked. Had he heard him right? There had been no venom in his voice, no bile, no snarky attitude. It was a simple, sincere and close to sweet answer. Shane looked over at Rick and Daryl. He had been the only one to hear Merle. "Sweet tea or Coke?"

"Either." Merle had yet to move. Whatever he was staring at in the corner of the garage had his rapt attention. "Please..."  
There was a pause. A deep ragged breath.

Shane was more than a little concerned about Merle at this point. Merle was rarely, if ever, polite. "Yeah. You okay?"

Merle didn't answer. The silence between them felt heavy to Shane. He cleared his throat. He had to stop himself from reaching out to help Merle up or pat his shoulder. If the situation were reversed Shane wouldn't want the contact. He would want to be alone to get his shit back in check. Something had definitely shaken Merle up. Shane didn't have any clue what it could have been but he felt for Merle.

"Let's get going Rick. You two can play grab ass tonight." He turned to walk out the bay doors but not before casting one more look at Merle.

Merle didn't move a muscle, he didn't even breathe deeply until he was sure Shane was really gone. He listened as the footfalls of both officers faded. He finally let out a long shaky sigh.

"Wanna tell me what tha hell happened ta have ya so spooked Merle?"

Merle shook his head hard once as he shoved himself up off the floor with more force than necessary. "Nope."

 

Merle stalked out the backdoor to the alley. He needed a smoke. His insides were quivering like a bowl full of jello. He paced like a tiger in a cage that was too small and impossibly unnatural. He unzipped his coveralls and stripped down to the waist, his white tank top clung to his muscles. He cracked his neck as he lit a cigarette.

What the fuck was his problem? He didn't believe in magic or curses. But he couldn't deny the thoughts and urges he was having. He thought of Shane's breath so near his ear earlier. Just that had him hard again. He kicked the tin trash can halfway down the alley.

Daryl gave him enough time to smoke two cigarettes before entering the alley. He plopped down on a milk crate. He watched Merle pace the length of the small alleyway. Daryl had a fleeting thought. He acted much the same after he met Rick, he wasn't ready then to face the way he felt about his now husband. Daryl chewed on his thumbnail as he thought about what could be eating his brother alive, because it was obvious there was an issue. He was willing to wait. He was determined to be there for Merle.

Merle came to a halt in front of Daryl. He gazed down the empty alley. "Did Granny Ames ever tell ya about gypsy magic baby brother?"

Daryl blinked in surprise. "Huh?"

"Gypsy magic. I know she told us about magic an' shit. I jus' never listened. You did. What did she say 'bout gypsies?"

Daryl looked into Merle's eyes and was shocked to see his older brother was dead serious. "Um." He swallowed hard. "Lemme think."

Merle nodded and continued to pace.

"Anything in particular ya wantin' to know 'bout?"

"Curses."

"What tha hell did ya get into?"

"I ain't sure an' don't take that damn tone with me."

"What kinda curse?"

Merle closed his eyes. The words that Miri had spoken came to him instantly. He could see them blazing in his mind's eye.

"Your heart's deepest desires will show themselves and your truest nature will be revealed to all." Merle sounded far away as he dreamily repeated the words.

Daryl noted that Merle didn't sound like himself in the least; his eyes were closed and he swayed as the strange voice came out of him. Daryl groaned. This could not be good, at all. "Sssshit."

Daryl approached Merle. He gently shook his older brother by the shoulder. Once Merle was focused on Daryl, Daryl spoke quietly. "Start at tha beginnin' an' tell me ever'thin' ya remember."

When Merle was finished telling his story Daryl shook his head. "After we eat, you an' me are gonna go see this gal. Find out exactly what we're dealing with here. If it can be lifted, reversed or taken back. Sounds more like a truth revealing than a curse."

"Tha fuck does that mean?"

"Means she called your truth out. Whatever that is. Whatever subconscious secret deep in your soul that you haven't yet been ready to face."

The look on Merle's face told him that Merle was confused but intrigued.

"Fer example, mine woulda been when I met Rick. 'Fore him I never gave a rat's ass 'bout finding love. Sex was somethin' I did but never saw the big appeal of, it was never satisfying. Jus' thought stuff like that wasn't fer me. Rick opened up a part of me I didn' even know was closed off."

Daryl looked up expecting to receive a glare or some sort of reproach from his older brother. Instead Merle was nodding along. His eyes were fixed on the ground. He looked deep in thought.

"An' like Aaron leavin' ta be an artist instead of jus' paintin' cars his whole life?"

Daryl smiled. "Jus' like that."

"If it ain't a curse then it can't be taken back. If it's this truth thang, then it just is, right?"

Daryl studied Merle's face. The thought of that made Merle very solemn. Daryl chewed his bottom lip as he thought about what his brother's truth could be. Daryl knew that most people looked at Merle as one of God's lowliest and simplest creations. However, the truth was, the man was complicated and multi-faceted.

"That's one of tha thangs we'll find out from her."

One of the guys called for Daryl from inside. Daryl slid his gaze over to Merle who was so lost in his own head he hadn't heard it. "I'll be back. Jus' stay here. We'll figure this out together."

Merle let everything that Daryl told him sink in. He was trying to wrap his head around his truth and what it could have to do with the way he was acting.

  
Shane walked into the garage with Rick. He was carrying Merle's lunch in a bag, he also had a large Coke. Daryl was in the middle of a phone call. Rick sat beside him. Daryl looked at Rick, something heavy in his eyes. Shane decided to give them a moment. He walked around looking for Merle.

"He's out back in the alley." Dale said on his way past Shane.

Merle was smoking his sixth cigarette when Shane came out into the alley. Merle didn't look over, thinking it was Daryl. "I thought 'bout what ya said."

"Yeah? Well if you wanted a milkshake it's too damned late now."

Merle wasn't expecting that voice. At the very sound of it he fumbled his cigarette, burning himself. "Damnit!" Merle sucked his burnt thumb into his mouth.

Shane watched as Merle's thumb disappeared into his mouth. The thick tongue swirling around the finger as it flicked out. Those plump lips wrapped and sucked so eagerly at the sore appendage. Shane almost dropped the bag of food. He swallowed the groan that begged to be released.

"What?" Thumb still in Merle's mouth. Merle tried his best to make his voice sound intimidating as he glared at Shane. The look on Shane's face was doing strange things to Merle.

Shane shuffled his feet. He held up both hands with the soda and bag in them. "Got your lunch."

"Thanks." Merle focused on making an effort to keep his manner and tone gruff. The goofy smile on Shane's face was making that so damn difficult. "Jus' leave it in tha break room."

He turned his back on Shane to study the mural that Aaron had painted on the back wall of the shop. He wasn't sure how long he could keep his guard up around the other man. He felt that same strange pull toward Shane again. The oddest thing about it was how familiar it was becoming in such a short amount of time.

Shane frowned. "See you tonight."

Merle didn't say anything. His stomach twisted slightly at the thought of them being alone together in the garage after hours. He suppressed a shiver. His whole being relaxed when he felt Shane's presence abate.

\---------------------------------------------

Daryl stared at the ramshackle exterior of the bar. The faded neon sign said open despite how early it was in the afternoon. Merle sat in the passenger seat of the old ford pickup fidgeting. Merle wasn't one to squirm or act antsy normally. He also wasn't usually this quiet. Daryl couldn't help the concern that curled around his spine.

"Ya ready?"

Merle sighed heavily. He had done a lot of thinking in the past two hours. He wasn't sure he wanted Daryl present for his conversation with Miri. He was pretty damn positive it wouldn't go well or even start without Daryl's help. "Ready as I'll ever be, baby brother."

Merle opened the door to the bar and stepped in first. The air was warmer inside than out. The ceiling fans wheezed and turned as slowly as possible. The floors were scuffed and stained from countless spills as well as innumerable bar fights. The entire place smelled of old smoke and stale beer. In the clear light of day Merle wondered why he even came to a place like this. He had a nicer dart board and colder beer at home. There was a pool hall two blocks from the shop. "Cause a place like this is where ya think ya belong."

The thought struck a chord with Merle. He nodded and whispered aloud, "yeah, tha's right."

"Huh?" Daryl knew his brother had spoken but didn't know what he had said.

"Nuthin'. Musta been thinkin' out loud." Merle scratched his head. He was just about to tell the bartender he was looking for Miri when she appeared out of nowhere.

She smiled broadly. "Something to say to me? Or come to actually tip me properly this time?" She noted the emotional storm brewing in Merle's eyes. "Or maybe both."

Merle rubbed his palm along his neck. He shifted his weight between his feet. "I... uh... can we talk?"

"Sure, have a seat, Merle. I'll get us some cokes. You'll need to be sober for this."

Merle sank down into the nearest chair. Daryl slid out the chair closest to his brother and flipped it around. He sat facing the back of the chair a few feet from Merle. He wanted to give them a sense of privacy but still be close to his brother. Merle was nervous. That alone set Daryl on edge.

Miri came back to the table with a pitcher of soda and three glasses. She poured up the drinks, passed them out, and sat down.  
She turned her clear, emerald gaze on Merle.

"Feeling a bit different today?"

Merle nodded. He couldn't look away from her. His voice was stuck in his throat.

"I didn't drug your beer last night. I can understand why you would think that and I'm not offended."

Merle's eyes widened. "Fuckin' a! Ya read minds or somethin'?"

Miri winked, "Or something."

"Ya curse him or do a truth revelation on him?"

Miri's attention snapped to the younger of the two men. "I'm Miri. What do you know about truth revelations?"

"M' Daryl. Nice to meetcha. Not enough ta help my brother. Tha's why we're here. Need yer help." Daryl's tone was smooth and sincere. He wanted to fix this for Merle but he couldn't. They needed her. He doubted Merle was going to admit it so Daryl said it for them both.

Her eyes swung back over to Merle. "Is that right? You need sugartits' help?"

Daryl choked on his coke. "Ya didn't..."

Merle slunk lower in his chair. He groaned and covered his eyes in shame. "Look, I know I got a damn mouth on me..."

She cut him off mid sentence. "Know what you could do with that mouth. I do believe those were your exact words. I imagine by now you know exactly what you want to do with yours." The pointed look she gave Merle wasn't missed by Daryl.

Daryl took his red bandana from his jeans pocket. He smacked Merle with it. "Damnit Merle!"

Miri's eyes danced with mirth. She enjoyed the interaction between the two brothers.

Merle was shamefaced. "Yeah I was a real disrespectful fuck."

"Ya think?" Daryl glared at his brother. "Yer lucky she didn't shrink yer dick!"

Miri laughed softly. "I thought about it. Instead I did him a favor."

"A favor? Jus' how in tha hell do ya figure ya did me a favor? Ya got no idea what I've been going through all damn day." Merle wasn't angry, he sounded more defeated than anything.

"I'm pretty sure I do."

Merle gazed at the floor then over to Daryl. His gut twisted at the guilt and shame he felt.

"Let me guess. Little brother here is gay and you've given him a lot of shit about it over the years since he came out."

Merle cut his eyes at her. He was silently begging her to stop talking.

Daryl nodded at her words. "He was a homophobic asshole at first. He's a lot better than he was. He an' my husband get along pretty well now."

Miri's gaze flickered between the two men. Merle was still silently pleading with her with his eyes not to call him out in front of his brother. "I did you favor by helping you figure out what it is you truly want and need."

Merle looked pale. "This ain't no curse, is it?"

"You know it isn't. You know this is the truth. Your truth. Who you are. What are you so afraid of?"

Merle swallowed hard. He felt a little panicky. Images swam in his mind of all the insults he had hurled at Daryl and Rick years ago. He thought about how often he stole glimpses at Shane when no one was looking. He thought about the number of erotic dreams that Shane starred in. How he chased women to prove to himself that he was a real man. How hollow and unsatisfactory it was each time. _"Everythin’.”_ The word echoed through Merle's mind. He hadn't spoken out loud.

"So what does he need ta do?" Daryl broke the tense silence.

"Accept himself. He'll be happy."

Merle scoffed at that. "Happy? I look happy ta ya?"

"No. You drip misery. That's the main reason I gifted you with the truth revelation. You need to be released from the prison you put yourself in. You're not a free man. You want to be. You can be."

Merle's head flushed deep red. How did she know that he felt like he was still in captivity? There were times he could barely breathe because he felt so completely trapped.

"This is a gift?"

"Yes. Tell me, when is the last time you were truly, utterly happy?"

Merle didn't have to think. He knew the answer. " _Never_ " his inner voice hissed.

Merle's voice was gruff yet soft when he spoke. "Why give me a gift?"

Miri sighed. She had been pissed off at Merle's behavior and her temper had flared but the decision to utter the truth revealing had been conscious. "Everyone deserves a chance at happiness."

Daryl agreed silently. Merle looked about ready to jump out of his skin. Daryl knew that Merle had more to say. Daryl also knew Merle wouldn't say it in front of him. He stood. "Bathroom thatta way?"

Miri nodded.

Daryl gave Merle a once over. "Ya a'right?"

"Yeah. M' fine."

Daryl met his brother's eyes. Once he was satisfied Merle wasn't lying he headed to the back of the bar.

"You have questions." Miri's voice was soft and musical.

"Only bout a shit ton."

Miri laughed softly. "It may not seem like it now but this is and will be good for you."

Merle squirmed in his chair. He really did have a lot of questions but he wasn't sure where to start.

"Just start talking."

"Ain't that easy. I... uh... well my thinkin' is all fucked up right now."

"Maybe you're finally thinking clearly Merle."

He let that sink in. He couldn't deny to himself that this was not the first time he had pictured Shane in a sexual way. Usually he was beyond drunk or asleep when it happened and he could dismiss it the morning after.

"If this ain't a curse then I can't be forced into anythin' right?"

"Right. Anything you do, think, or say is your decision and your free will."

Merle sighed heavily. He was afraid of that. The minute Daryl had uttered the words "truth revealing" Merle had a cement brick in his stomach big enough to drown a pack of wild horses. He scrubbed his face with his hands. He had a lot of soul searching to do but damn if he wanted to do it. Merle was more of a doer than a thinker.

"You know your brother will support you. He'd walk through fire for you. I can see it. He wants you to be happy."

"Don't know how." Merle hadn't meant to say it but he didn't regret the admission.

"You'll learn."

He could learn. He had learned a lot in his life even if most people considered him stupid. He wanted to be happy; wasn't sure he deserved it but damn how he wanted it. He wanted that easy peaceful contentment that he saw in Daryl. He knew Daryl deserved it. He leaned in whispering over the table. "This ain't a trick is it? I ain't gonna learn ta accept myself then just get mind fucked am I?

Miri hated the sad resignation and fear she saw in his eyes. "No. What you discover about yourself is yours and no one can take it away from you. There is no trick. This isn't a game."

Merle studied her closely as she spoke. Years in the system and being around the lowlifes he dealt with while he was using taught him a lot about reading people. She seemed sincere. There were no signs of deception in her eyes or in her mannerisms. Slowly he began to relax and let the questions start flowing.

Miri and Merle were deep in conversation when Daryl came out of the bathroom. He had the distinct feeling he would be interrupting if he returned to the table. Instead he settled in at the bar to smoke and watch tv. A half hour later he felt a rough familiar hand land on his shoulder.

"Ready? I got a ton of work ta do before closin'."

Daryl smiled. Merle looked relieved and less burdened than he had in a long while. Daryl nodded as he stood to dig the keys from his pocket. Miri smiled and waved as the brothers left the bar.

"Everythin' ok?" Daryl cranked the truck.

"Will be, baby brother. Will be."

Merle sounded so sure that Daryl couldn't fight the relaxed smile that spread across his face.

"Got her number in case I got more questions or need ta talk."

Daryl shook his head. "Only you. Ya be careful with that. Ya forget yer manners again and start being a pig she will curse yer ass!"

Merle laughed. "Ain't like that this time."

"Heard that before."

They drove back to the shop teasing each other and laughing over old memories.

  
\-------------------------------------------------

Around four forty-five everyone but Merle starting cleaning up and getting ready to go. He had enough work to keep him busy steadily until the shop officially closed at 7. Noah approached him. "Want some help in case anything else comes in?"

The procedure was that excepting emergencies and pre-scheduled service anything that came after five was slotted for first thing the next morning and given a loaner if it was needed. Not a difficult process but it could be time consuming. Merle didn't mind Noah. He was quiet, polite, and pretty much kept to himself. "If it's a'right with Daryl it won't bother me."

Noah was pleased, relieved, and shocked. He had been nervous about approaching Merle. Merle could be surly on a good day and downright terrifying on a bad one. This had not been a particularly good day. The young man ran off to talk to Daryl.

Daryl looked out at his brother laid out underneath an SUV, working. "He said it wouldn't bother him?"

"I was just as shocked as you after the day he's had. I usually wouldn't ask but I need the extra hours for school and honestly..."

Daryl looked up at Noah. Concern was written on the young man's face. "Go on."

"Well we're all worried about him. This way he won't be alone but he won't have anyone up in his face. I'll just have his back if he needs it."

Daryl smirked. Noah was feisty and loyal, one of the reasons Daryl had hired him. "A'right. If ya need me, either of ya, ya call me. Shane is coming by right around closing so if ya need ta leave it'll be fine."

"I'll leave at closing. Got a class at eight."

Daryl felt better knowing that Merle would have someone close. The afternoon had passed without incident. Merle had returned to work, kept to himself, and got a lot done. He seemed to be less burdened than he had been earlier.

  
Rick showed up at five in his jeep to pick up Daryl. "Shane'll bring the cruiser by later. He’s staying late - paperwork."

"Uh huh. That paperwork must be blonde and answer to some God awful southern feminine name."

Rick rolled his eyes but laughed. "I never thought Eric was either southern or feminine, but I could be wrong."

Daryl snorted. "Figured he would be breaking in that new office manager y'all got. Andrea, was it?"

"Yeah that's her name. Shane refers to her as the ice queen. 'I'm telling you, Rick, you could fuck her with an icicle and the damn thing wouldn't melt!'" Rick did his best impression of Shane.

Merle watched Daryl and Rick laughing. The smile that spread across his face was genuine. Rick made Daryl happy and that was enough for Merle, but on top of it Rick was an honest, good man. He and Daryl were perfect together. Merle had realized and accepted that years ago but his pride wouldn't allow him to say it aloud.

Daryl approached the bay. "We're heading out. Noah is gonna stay 'til closin'. Call me if ya need me."

"This ain't my first rodeo, Daryl. Ya go on. I got this. Y'all have fun on yer date." There was no mockery or disdain in his voice.

Daryl recognized Merle's sincerity. It caught him off guard. Daryl thought about the way this day had progressed. He made a mental note to stop by the bar and thank Miri. Merle already seemed more at ease in his own skin.

\------------------------------------------------

Noah stayed out of Merle's way. He cleaned up the break room, slotted a few repairs for the next morning, and finished up a stack of paperwork for Dale. He had flipped on the stereo system as he settled into the office. He didn't notice that the feed was still on in the garage area.

Merle didn't pay attention to the music until ' _Baby, I'm preying on you tonight. Hunt you down eat you alive. Just like animals, animals, like animals...'_ hit his ears.

He felt a twist in his gut and a strong tingling much lower. Shane immediately appeared in his mind's eye, dark eyes blazing, intently focused on Merle. The groan that escaped him was swallowed up by the next line. _'Maybe you think that you can hide. I can smell your scent for miles. Just like animals, animals, like animals.'_

Merle doubled over as a shiver wiggled all the way up his spine and down again. He felt little beads of sweat rolling down his temple. The music swelled louder as Merle's heartbeat thudded in his temples. From the corner of his eye he saw Noah gathering up his stuff. Merle closed his eyes and took a long, shaky breath. He focused on getting himself under control before the young man came to lock up the outside of the shop. Mercifully at that moment the stereo cut off. Merle gripped the side of the truck he was working on.

Noah walked in, it was right at seven. He closed all the bay doors but the last one. "Want me to leave this open for Walsh?"

Merle glanced at the clock. "Told that asshole not to be late" he grumbled. "Yeah, I'll close it if he ain't here by tha time I get done with this'un."

Noah silently finished locking up the rest of the garage then headed out after telling Merle goodnight. Merle was grateful that Noah had kept his distance and didn't make idle chatter.

Merle's cell phone rang. He didn't bother to look at the caller ID. "Told ya I'd be fine. Get back to Officer Friendly."

There was silence on the other side of the line. Merle heard music. " _So what you trying to do to me? It's like we can't stop we're enemies. But we get along when I'm inside you. You're like a drug that's killing me. I cut you out entirely. But I get so high when I'm inside you."_ He recognized it as the same song from earlier. He tried not to tremble but failed.

  
"If ya butt dialed me while y'all are fuckin’ m’gonna kick yer ass Daryl I swear ta Christ."

The raspy moan he heard was not Daryl or Rick. "Yeah..hit those knees for me."

The words as well as the huskiness of the voice saying them made Merle quiver. "S..Sh...Shane?"

"Told you I'd call if I was going to be late. Ran into something that needs immediate attention."

"I just bet ya did." Merle snarled. He was instantly furious. "I can NOT fuckin' believe that ya called ME while yer dickin' around!" He hung up the phone.

It rang again. Merle glared at it. He wasn't mad that Shane was late. He wasn't even pissed that he would have to work even later. The realization of exactly what he was feeling literally knocked him down. He landed on his ass with a thud.

The phone stopped ringing. Merle groaned as he cradled his head in his hands. "Fuck me" he muttered. The ringing started again. He answered. "Tha fuck ya want Walsh? I'm busy."

"I'm going to be late. Don't leave."

Merle's lips curled up in a sneer. "Are ya fuckin' kiddin' me right now, Shane?" He let loose a mirthless laugh. "First, ya ain't my goddamn boss! Second, ya were told to be here by seven. I ain't got time for this shit man. Whatever whore you got on her knees ain't as damn important as them repairs ya been bitchin' 'bout. Get yer fuckin' priorities together man!" Merle hung up without allowing Shane a chance to reply.

Shane glared at the phone. Merle had hung up on him twice. Shane's jaw clenched in aggravation. He took a deep breath and looked down as Eric mouthed him through his work pants. Eric was great at giving head. Shane never let anything distract him from great oral, but he was pissed off. Also something in Merle's tone made Shane pause.

Eric rubbed Shane through the fabric. "Want to suck you. Please sir."

Shane stroked his cheek. "Always so sweet." Eric didn't take Shane's cock out because he hadn't been given permission. He continued to stroke and mouth Shane as much as he could.

Shane dialed Merle's number again. Merle sent it straight to voicemail. Shane hung up and pressed redial. On the third try Merle answered. "Well whoever the fuck ya got there with ya must be shit at what their doin' if ya keep callin' me in the middle."

"Shut your fuckin' mouth Merle." The silence crackled between them. "I know you're working late tonight whether I'm there or not, so quit your bitchin'! I'll be there when I get there."

"I ain't got all night Officer. If ya ain't here by tha time I finish up this truck I'm taking my ass home. Ain't waiting on ya all night so ya can get yer dick wet!"

Shane's laugh caused Merle to grit his teeth. "Jealous?"

Merle went pale. Fuck yes he was jealous. Merle cut off the moan that was trying to escape with a curt grunt. He was jealous of whoever Shane was with.

"Of what? Ya gettin' blown in a back alley by some slut workin' her way out of a damn ticket?"

Shane staggered back a little. He hissed under his breath. That comment had stung. "You think that's the only way I can get someone on their knees for me?"

"I know ya already fucked half the county. Guess yer workin' on the other half now." Merle snapped.

"You son of a bitch. What's it to you who I fuck? Ain't none of your damn business!"

"Ya made it my business when ya called. You called me, 'member? Ya get off on people hearing ya or some shit? Whatever... Do whatever an who tha fuck ever ya want. Jus' leave me outta it. I'm goin' home." Merle hoped he didn't sound as despondent as he felt.

When Merle answered with a growl Shane growled back. "Don't you dare hang up on me again! Now, you listen to me. I'm going to be another thirty minutes at least."

Merle sputtered. "Doubt I'll be here. I'm almost done. Ain't waitin' on ya Walsh, I mean it."

Shane didn't get a chance to respond as the line went dead again. "Fuck!" Shane backed up to lean against his cruiser. His erection gone. Before he could process any of what was happening the police radio crackled.

"Walsh! I know you have your cruiser out. You better have your pants on! We got a full out fight at Grady's. That damn bar is a hazard. I need all hands on deck, so move your ass!"

Shane shook his head. Sheriff Abraham Ford was not one for radio etiquette or fancy words.

"Walsh, I'm waiting."

Shane scrubbed his left hand over his face in frustration. "Yeah boss. I'm close, on my way."

"What I like to hear."

Shane gave Eric an apologetic smile. "Duty calls, Sir. Call me next time you're ready to play."

Shane ruffled Eric's hair before Eric stood up. "Thanks for understanding."

Shane called Merle three more times. He finally left a message. "Damnit Merle! Don't leave. I got called in."

\-----------------------------------------------

  
Merle glared in the direction of the phone each time it rang. When it buzzed to alert him of a voicemail, he turned it off. "Fuckin' asshole!" It took Merle another forty five minutes to finish the truck, clean up, and lock everything down. Merle was pissed that Shane still hadn't arrived. When Merle pulled out of the drive it had been over an hour since he had heard from Shane. It was close to nine. Merle was tired, hungry, filthy, and more than a little pissed off. He thought of stopping by Grady's to get a beer and a burger but decided against it. Friday night in that hole was not where he needed or wanted to be in his current mood.

Merle stopped by the local grocery store for a frozen pizza, a case of beer, a carton of cigarettes, and a gallon of rocky road ice cream. He got into Carol's line since it had the shortest wait.

They knew each other because of Rick and Daryl. She was friendly but shy. Merle knew she had a hard life before her husband had been decapitated in a construction accident at his job site several years earlier. She and her daughter, Sophia, were better off with him gone. Carol was no longer covered in suspicious bruises, thick layers of makeup, or large dark sunglasses.

Carol smiled at Merle. She eyed his purchases. "Rough day?" Her voice held no judgement, just curiosity and perhaps concern.

"Sumthin' like it. How're you an' yer girl?"

Carol's face softened at the mention of Sophia. "We're good. Thanks for asking. How are you?"

Merle opened his mouth to say something half smart and half sarcastic, all that came out was a heavy sigh. It had been a long, emotional, and utterly shitty day.

"That good?" Carol reached down into her bag and pulled out a large plastic wrapped soup spoon. She eyed the return cart next to her and grabbed the bottle of chocolate syrup. She put both things in his bags. "Trust me, makes it better."

"Ring it up, and thanks."

"Nope. It's on me. Way I figure it, I owe you. I've noticed all the extra work on my car that I was never billed for." She winked and grinned.

Merle shifted his weight on his feet, feeling uncomfortable with the attention. He felt a blush creeping up his neck. "Weren't nuthin', Carol."

"Was to me."

He gave her a sheepish smile as he took his bags.

"Skip the bowl. Tastes better straight from the carton."

Merle laughed and shook his head as he headed for the door. "Not my style. Have a good 'un, doll."

"You too, sugar."

\------------------------------------------

Merle pulled into his gravel driveway. He had smoked four cigarettes on the short ride to his house. He felt like he had lead in his boots. He shut the old baby blue Chevy truck off, but kept the radio on. The old hard rock station calmed his nerves. His whole body hurt. Anger and desire flared up at each thought of Shane. "Fuck it!"

Merle grabbed the gallon of ice cream, the spoon and the chocolate syrup. The irony and humor was not lost on him that he was drowning his sorrows in ice cream straight from the carton like some damned jilted school girl. His inner voice was cackling. As he shoved a syrupy dripping spoonful into his mouth he snarled. "Shut tha fuck up."

He didn't focus on the fact that he was face first in a gallon of ice cream with syrup on his chin. He tapped his foot and sang along to "The Joker." Carol had the right idea. He felt better already. He sang loudly and off key to "Simple Man." He was thinking females had the right idea on this eating your feelings thing. He cut his inner voice off with a growl.

The next song faded in. He knew it, but couldn't place it at first. He idly licked a spot of the chocolate syrup from his wrist. The minute the words filled the truck Merle felt a bolt of desire that made his dick immediately hard. A rush of pure rage followed that.

_"Burn out the day. Burn out the night. I can't see no reason to put up a fight. I'm living for giving the devil his due. And I'm burning, I'm burning, I'm burning for you."_

Merle honked the horn in his rush to rip the keys from the engine. "Oh fuck this!"

He harshly pushed the door to his trailer open. After he dumped the groceries on the kitchen table he turned the oven on and located a beat up pizza pan. He shoved the pizza in his oven and stuffed the ice cream in the freezer. He grabbed the bottle of whiskey off the top of the fridge as he trudged to the shower.

Thirty minutes later Merle was sprawled out on the couch gnawing on a large folded piece of pizza with the bottle of whiskey in the other hand. He stared blindly at the superhero movie flickering across the tv screen. "Fuckin' Walsh!"

\----------------------------------------------

Across town Shane was knee deep in drunks. He and the other officers had four people in custody. Grady, the owner of the dive bar, was pressing charges for destruction of property. The huge flat screen tv over the bar was shattered and barely hanging on the wall. Glass was everywhere. Several pool sticks had been broken in half.

Shane approached Joe. He was familiar with the gruff looking biker. Joe had a large gash on his forehead that was pouring blood. Miri got him ice and a towel. The paramedics were on their way. Joe winced as he lifted the towel to his cut. He was pretty sure that asshole Gareth broke his ribs with the pool stick.

"Care to tell me what happened?"

Joe didn't look at Shane. He was afraid that Shane was going to slap cuffs on him. "Was playing pool, I won fair and square. The kid is a sore loser. He lost his shit and attacked me. His friends helped."

"Ya telling me it was four to one?"

"Grady helped break it up. Look at me! Do I look like I had any other help?"

Joe's lip was busted. His eye was turning a dark purple. He was bleeding and holding his ribs. Shane shook his head. "Want to press charges?"

"Sure as fuck do! I ain't got the money for the damn ER and I don't have a choice about going. I'm gonna need stitches."

Shane agreed as Joe exposed the gaping cut on his forehead. "Yeah, you are."

Shane looked around the bar. He didn't see any of the crowd that usually hung around with Joe. "None of your friends around tonight?"

"Nope. I'm all alone Officer."

"Merle supposed to meet you?"

Miri brought Joe an ice pack for his lip. She noticed the tone in Shane's voice as well as the look in his eyes as he mentioned Merle. She smiled softly. His fondness for the rough and tough older Dixon was written all over him.

Joe grunted and ignored him. "Thanks Miri."

"You're welcome Joe." She offered him a pat on his shoulder. She turned to address Shane. "Joe didn't start this, he was defending himself. It was four on one and I bet if you test those boys they are high as kites."

Once Shane met her eyes, Miri added. "Merle hasn't been in tonight. Don't expect him either since he has to work late."

Shane's eyes narrowed. Miri was beautiful. "How do you know Merle?"

"Oh we're old friends."

Joe laughed and winced at the pain that caused. "Friends? That's a hell of a way to put it."

"Shush you." Miri winked at Joe.

Shane felt his heart drop to the pit of his stomach. She was exactly Merle's type. Shane felt the heat creep up his face. He was jealous and embarrassed. "Fuck today" he muttered under his breath as he walked outside.

"Come on, pick up." Shane tried the garage's number. The voicemail picked up on the fifth ring. Shane hung up then dialed Merle's cell. It went straight to voicemail. "Fuck!"

Shane checked his watch. It was almost nine. "Fuckity fuck fuck!”

Abe strode toward Shane. "Get Joe in the ambulance and on the way to the damn hospital. Then take the punk in your car down to the station. If you got the victim's statement you can leave after you turn twatwaffle over to booking."

Shane nodded. "Got his side and a witness statement as well."

"Good work. Take your ass home, you look like shit and you have the day shift tomorrow."

Shane sighed. "Been a long fucking day boss."

"I hear that. See ya tomorrow." Abraham got into the SUV and drove off.

\--------------------------------------

Shane had lost all hope of catching Merle but he still went to the garage. It was a quarter to ten. Everything was locked up and all the lights were out. Shane noticed a note on the gate. He crawled out of the cruiser to take a look. It was handwritten on a paper towel. He recognized the handwriting.

"Fuck you Walsh! Hope yer shitty back alley BJ was worth it." There was a crudely drawn hand flipping the bird on it.

Shane wanted to scream. He kicked the fence hard as he ripped the note down.  
"Damnit Merle!"

He drove home with the idea of getting piss drunk.

\---------------------------------------

Shane made sure his finger was nice and wet by getting Merle to suck it. The slurping sounds Merle made were absolutely obscene. When he pulled his finger from Merle's mouth the popping sound was music to Shane's ears. When Shane circled Merle's hole the gasp and little whimper the man made was so fucking sexy. "Ever had anything here before?"

Merle moaned as Shane pressed the tip of his finger against Merle's tight entrance. "Yes sir, Officer. My pinky."

Shane bit back a moan of his own. He bent closer to Merle, pressing his chest to Merle's back. "When was the first time that happened?"

Merle cried out as Shane licked his earlobe. He blushed bright red. "Tha first day ya rode my ass ‘bout parole. Ya slammed me against yer patrol car an' threatened ta cuff me."

Shane growled. "Oh I wanted to put you on your knees that day. Tell me, all of it."

Merle couldn't make the words come. Shane nipped at his neck while that wicked finger traced light circles all over his quivering hole.

"I'm waiting boy."

Merle shivered like an electric shock went through his whole body. "I...I... Fuck I was so pissed I went home an' got three sheets ta tha wind. I was cussing ya. Who did ya think ya were threatenin' me? Ya were jus' so strong. Ya had yer body pressed against mine an' I couldn't even move. No one had ever done that ta me before."

Merle's voice had taken on a soft dreamy quality. "I was so hard it ached. But jackin' jus' wasn't enough. Had to get there...had to..."

"Needed more didn't you, baby?" Shane sucked a spot on Merle's neck.

"Yes..." Sweat was rolling down Merle's shoulders. He shook with the strength of trying to remain still.

"Tell me, sweet boy." Shane practically purred.

Merle whimpered. He wanted to tell Shane everything but didn't have the words.

"What did you think of when you used your pinky?"

"You."

"Uh huh, and what was I doing to you?"

"Teasing me."

"How was I teasing you, baby? I want to know all the details."

Merle closed his eyes and remembered. "I was on my back. Ya were hoverin' over me, watchin’ me while ya teased me with the head of your cock against my hole."

Shane smiled broadly. "Oh I like the sound of that. I think we could make that happen."

Merle whined. Shane's finger felt so good. Merle backed up on it and began to grind his hips. "Please."

"Tell me what you want. If you ask sweetly I'll make it happen."

"Please Shane. Need more. Please."

"Don't think you're ready for another finger just yet. Don't want you hurtin’. I mean for all of this to feel good. Bend over the hood of the car, sweet boy."

"Yes sir." Merle bent and automatically spread his cheeks. Presenting himself to Shane.

"Hot damn! You are precious."

Merle blushed and grit his teeth. "Ain't precious."

Shane lightly smacked Merle's exposed hole. "You are to me, sweet boy. You're anticipating my wants and needs. I fucking love that. But I don't like sass."

Merle hissed at the chiding contact. "Yes sir. 'M sorry."

"That's better. You just keep being my sweet, precious boy and I'm going to make it feel so much better."

Merle felt the hot breath on his skin. He wasn't prepared when Shane licked his asshole. "Ffffffffffuck." He bucked beneath Shane.

Shane chuckled against Merle's hot flesh. He wrapped his arms around Merle's waist as he began to make a meal out of his boy. "Mmmmm, gawd you taste so sweet."

 

Merle woke with a start. The whiskey bottle slid from one hand, his dick was loosely fisted in the other. He’d decided after his shower not to put clothes on. The vividness of the dream felt too real to him. He moaned loudly as he remembered the feeling of Shane's tongue and hands. He noticed something warm and sticky covering his right hand. He was shocked as he looked down. "Ya got ta be shittin' me!" The back of his hand was covered in cum. Merle couldn't remember the last time he’d had a wet dream.

He closed his eyes and groaned. His hand was quickly becoming sticky. He had sweated a good bit in his sleep. His head was fuzzy. "Shit" he grumbled. Merle slowly hauled his ass off the couch. Once in the bathroom he eyed the shower. His cock was only semi soft. He could take a nice, relaxing shower instead of the quick, rough scrub down he took earlier. His bones ached. He turned on the water.

Once the temperature was perfect he stepped under the spray. He braced his hands on either side of the shower head. As soon as his eyes closed Shane was there, taking up his space, breathing his air, looking him over with hungry eyes. Merle jerked back as if he had been bitten. The thought of Shane biting him brought back flashes of the earlier dream. Merle shivered as he remembered the feel of Shane's mouth on his most intimate parts.

Merle's cock jumped to full attention at the memory as desire twisted low in his gut. He felt like a horny teenager. Ignoring the raging hard on was not an option. It was throbbing wildly with the pulse of the water droplets hitting it. Merle let out a loud and needy moan. He wanted to cum. He wanted to be under Shane, wiggling and whimpering as the deputy took care of his carnal needs. Need... Fuck. He needed Shane.

Even that weighty revelation was not enough to cause his cock to recoil. Part of Merle was severely pissed off at the thought of needing anyone. Shane appeared in the steamy air of the bathroom. Merle had to be hallucinating. He shut his eyes against it. He felt Shane's touch. Rationally Merle knew it was his very own hand touching him, but his mind screamed it was Shane. Merle's senses were betraying him. He smelled the oddly familiar scent of pine and charcoal from the aftershave Shane used. Merle heard Shane's raspy voice in his ear. "Gonna make you feel so good baby, just give in to me."

"Fuck yes!" Merle cried. His index finger traced the entrance of his hole. He stroked himself hard and fast with his other hand. Even though it felt good, none of it felt as good as Shane had in that damn dream. Merle focused on the memory of Shane lapping at him and eating his ass. He came harder than he had in years. He didn't even realize he was chanting Shane's name.

Merle felt made of lead yet boneless at the same time. He slid to the tub floor and lay there catching his breath. The full reality of his situation began to settle in. His heart's desire was one Shane Walsh. He scrubbed warm water over his face. "Well shit, yer well an' truly fucked now Ole Merle."


End file.
